Maybe, Maybe Mott – Buenos Aires, Argentina

Soaring ceilings, a covered outdoor lounge with earth-tone couches and a loft lit entirely by a vaulted skylight is a scene straight out of Soho. Except this time it’s Soho Palermo. Other than the obvious appeal of outdoor dining on a beautiful day in BA, Mott’s market-fresh theme holds obvious appeal for the traveler who has grown weary of meat-heavy mountains and carb-loaded pasta. When I saw the word “market”, I was half a minute from moving into Mott.

Market-fresh is a bold claim to make, but not as bold as the straight-off-the-vine flavor of the Butternut Squash Soup. Sweeter than pumpkin, stringier than summer, and smoothed by a tiny touch of cream, this soup is absolutely perfect.

The potatoes in my entrée were blissfully buttery, but they butchered my Bife de Chorizo. Unfortunately butchery is only appropriate for cows, not steak. (It’s ok, I groaned too.) I should have known when the waiter walked away without asking me how I wanted it cooked. I shouted rare at his retreating back, and judging by my almost-well-done steak, either he didn’t hear me or the chef chose not to hear anyone. Since my mott-o is that steak should always bleed so this particular cut wasn’t exactly my cup of mate. And it’s a sad day in Argentina when you scarf down the sautéed peppers and onions…next to your steak.

Scream all your want to ice cream, I’ll scream for this cream. It’s rare that a dessert becomes cream of the crop in a three-course meal, but the flavor of dulce de leche made this one the crème de la Crème Brulee.

The fact of the matter is, Mott messed up big time. They ruined a steak, which was the main reason I ordered this meal. But with a flawless setting and forever-fresh feel, Mott is the only place I’ve ever been where the ambiance actually improves the food. Natural light, fresh air, and food that claims to be fresh from the market, a winning combination hampered only by an overdone steak. I walked through much of Soho, and no one does design quite as well as Mott. I’d come back just to sit and soak it in. I’m not sure I’d eat another full meal, but that crème brulee would be simply irresistible.

Best Beef in the World – Argentina

If you have a beef with steak, I suggest you let it rest…on an Argentine grill. Because that’s exactly what I did and it worked just find for me…until I realized I would be spending the following month on a beach in St. Thomas. Shut up, I do NOT have a food baby...

Swimsuit shame aside, my rather anti-climactic introduction to Argentine steak started in Ushuaia. Maria Lola’s Lomo with raspberry red wine glaze turned out to be pretty lame-o. Lomo may be one of the most prized cuts, but lean is mean especially when it’s bland and slightly overdone, and the fruity sauce tasted a little too much like it put the J in PB&J.

The lomo was laughable, but a beef buff doesn’t throw in the napkin after one mediocre meat. Then a brief longing for Patagonian lamb led to a long ache for steak, which Rio Alba only enriched. A classic steakhouse, complete with elderly waiter who was clearly the strong, silent type, I rallied to an unsurprisingly amazing and fabulously flavorful Bife de Chorizo. Unfortunately, this one was cooked a little too close to medium but by no fault of theirs. I tried saying rojo, but word from the wise…aka the idiot who didn’t look up how to say rare in Spanish before going to a nice steakhouse…look up how to say rare in Spanish before you go to a nice steakhouse.

Rio Alba had a strong showing, but after two weeks of seeing almost no English-speaking tourists, I started to wonder where the gringos go. The answer is clearly La Cabrera where you get the Argentine steak with all the comfort of Ruth’s Chris. The wait staff speaks fluent English, and everything is as polished-as-can-be, down to the free flutes of champagne while you wait. There’s no better way to make an Asian glow…with happiness you racist. And what better occasion for this celebratory beverage than the wait for a flawless Ojo de Bife (ribeye)?

The best part is, La Cabrera’s steak comes with all the fixin’s. Far as I could see, that wasn’t typical when you order grilled meat in Argentina. Not only does your whopping 400 grams (0.88 pounds) of ribeye come with a complimentary salad, complete no less than 10 little crock-lets of optional add-ons, the sides are pretty swell. The sweet potato is sweet, the mashed potatoes creamy, and who can object to precious pearl onions in red wine?

They say when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. I say when life gives you a beef, make steak. If I ever had a beef, I’d want La Cabrera to make my steak. And if I have no beef with you, I won’t have a cow if you want to sit down and share.