Thursday, January 28, 2016

Poke Etc - Carson


Etc. Et cetera. Latin for "and other things", American for "the other stuff," or "the other stuff I don't care to mention." Well I'm sure the etc to the poke is fine, but it's hard to care about curry when you're face-to-face with shiny, market-fresh, chunky cubes of fish.


The Ahi with Limu is poke in its purest form, Hawaiian seaweed with a little bit of oil to bring out etc flavors of tuna.



I liked the tuna, but the limu left the slightest aftertaste. Plus the Limu could use a little more salt, seasoning, etc so I liked it better on the brinier Mussels. A saltier alternative is the Shoyu, a touch of soy and salt that doesn't alter the flavor, ideal for dressing tender arms of Octopus.



The shoyu works just as well with Salmon.



But Salmon with Wasabi makes for fun, smooth, neon bites that bite back.



The Ahi with Spicy Mayo renders the ahi obsolete, but annihilating properties aside, spicy mayo is still hella good.



Be sure to wash it down the salt with some island sugar-water. Hawaiian Sun is my senseless guilty pleasure.


Jus' Poke remains my geographic go-to, but Poke Etc has all the goods. The endless permutations of seafood and sauce are an unavoidably seductive selection, and it's impossible to stay away!
Poke Etc. Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Bossa Nova - West Hollywood


It's been a while since I've gone to a truly deplorable restaurant. After so many diplomatic reviews, I was afraid I was losing my touch. Then I went to Bossa Nova and it's time to let 'er rip.

I left with one lingering question: How does a restaurant with forgettable food and shameful service occupy prime-time real estate overlooking the iconic Abbey?


God I love Pao de Qieijo! Come hither you soft little cheesy breads! You know what I would have loved even more? The Sangria we ordered to go with them! The entire basket of bread was gone before we could flag a server to assist in the search for Sangria-la.



Good thing we got the Sangria before the entrees... It really filled in the 20- to 30-minute gap. The Chicken Skewers were gag-coughing dry and devoid of detectable seasoning. It's not a good sign when the best things on the plate are the plantains and the beans.



The Picanha was significantly better - at least they got the medium rare right. It's a tender cut for sure, and it's the only thing I don't regret besides the booze and the bread.


Seriously guys? One of the flashiest locations in WeHo and you can't wait a proper table? Clearly this place is run by the author of How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying!
Bossa Nova Brazilian Cuisine Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato

Teishokuya of Tokyo Inc. - Los Angeles


There is a reason some places have a 1-hour wait and others have more seats empty than full. Well the restaurant I wanted to go to had a line down the street, and we were in no mood to wait. The menu seemed to have something for everyone so here we settled.


The starters seemed promising, standard Edamame and a quiet Agedashi.



The Kara-age was crispy and enticing. I love thigh meat, and this meat was fried and fried well.



It went a bit downhill after that. They didn't have either type of cod roe udon so the server stood over me and glared wordlessly until I chose something else. I frantically choose the tsukemen udon. The udon was perfect, and the dipping broth made a pungent statement with chunky slices of pork, but rudeness murked up the concentrated broth.



The Unagi-Don tasted great...well, more like the eel sauce tasted great. The eel was tender, a small step above the prepackaged stuff in Asian marts. That said, $23 was a bit much.


I haven't been to Tokyo yet, but T.O.T feels like it could be a mediocre eatery somewhere along with backroad streets. The decor is expected and the simplicity seems authentic enough, but the Japanese food is much better in Torrance and this trip did NOT convince me to keep trekking to Little Tokyo.
Tot Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato

Friday, January 22, 2016

Kettle Glazed - Los Angeles


Now THIS is a donut shop! Conveniently seated in a small, seedy-looking shopping center on the corner of a long, dark highway-onramp street, there's no crowd to fight even on Saturday night.

Privacy breeds creativity, and the Cruffin' is so surprisingly out there it's hard to describe. The croissant dough maintains some crude layering, but the layers stack closely to make it dense and thick with all the best combo of croissant and muffin.



Annnnd Cronuts! Omg cronuts. Not quite worth the NYC hype with the mile-long lines, but the pastry-cream-chocolate-drizzle is worth at least a short one.


Even when not quite creative, Kettle Glazed is just plain delicious. The S'mores donut is filled with a small flurry of chocolate and marshmallow, a throwback to campfires and kumbaya.

You think you know what a Raspberry-Lemon Donut tastes like but you don't. This raspberry jam is less sickly-sweet than peanut butter's BFF, and it sits in a circle of lemon almost-icing that creates an exceptional balance.

I love anyone who can make a donut, but I bow to those who can make a tried-and-true taste like something exciting and new. I thought I'd tried all the donuts I've wanted to try, but it looks like I'm far from done with Kettle Glazed.
Kettle Glazed Donuts Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato

Japonica UPDATE - Redondo Beach

I just turned 30 last year, and I'll be 31 in just a few months. My Facebook feed is flooded with lists and the like, most of which are entitled, "What you learn in your 30s," "Why 30-somethings are more mature/wiser/cooler/more adult/better in every way than 20-somethings."

I don't feel better or cooler or more mature - I just feel older. If maturity means that everything below the neck starts to succumb to gravity and the fine lines don't fade, then you can have it! 

But maturity? An air of self-assured sophistication? I wouldn't mind some of that, and I could take a few lessons from Japonica. So elegant, a layout so ornately thought-out yet so sleek and chic. The dark storefront gives way to a den of dignified dinners, the nuances of light-on-black made for people in designer scarves sipping hot sake who actually know what they're drinking.

The House Hot Sake was plenty sophisticated for me. I'm sure it's as basic as they get, but it slides down warm and smooth.


The Agedashi Tofu goes the same way, delicately-fried cubes of silken tofu, dipped in a subtle brown broth.



The Albacore Tataki takes a different direction, delicate strips made hearty by a dense garlic butter soy sauce.



The Sashimi Sampler Grande isn't very grande, but the tastes of yellowtail, tuna, and salmon are fresh enough and hit the spot just fine when paired with sake.


Japonica's sushi and small plates are justifiably simple yet easily dwarfed by the flashier Casa Arigato, the fancier Sushi Chitose, and the bigger, better platters at Flyin Fin. But boy do I love their ambiance! The setting is so soft and understated, making it a great place to sit and sip.
Japonica Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato

Petty Cash Taqueria - Los Angeles

Petty Cash Taqueria had such potential. A petty amount of cash to spend on street tacos on our way up to Griffith Observatory was just what we needed to set the mood for the Star Party. Unfortunately, this experience was anything but celestial.


I wasn't aware that it was traditional to serve just one person at a time, but I can't think of any other reason for them to serve only one of our four cocktails, then the appetizer, followed by the remaining three drinks. The ice in the first drink was mostly melted and the appetizer finished by the time the other three drinks arrived. I have no idea where this tradition came from because I've ever met a Mexican person that rude.



Maybe they wanted us to drink after the appetizer so that we could forget about the lackluster Pig Ear Nachos. A single layer of maybe 12-14 chips, drowning in a slurry of sour cream, with a half-cooked (runny white...ewww) egg was about as pleasant as 6 PM on the 405...Windows down...next to a motorcycle. That averages out to $1 per chip, btw.



Unfortunately for us, the round-robin eating game never stopped. Only one side of the table can eat at any given time is the only rule I gleaned out of all this. The opposite side got their Al Pastor and I watched them eat it because it was starting to get cold. Then they watched me chow down on my Carne Asada, charred chunks of steak dampened by bland beans and guac that wasn't quite ripe.



Then it was their turn again, with the waiter unceremoniously waving yet another tiny taco, shouting "Mushroom!?!!? Mushroom!?!? Who had the mushroom!?!?!!" I'm sure it's hard to keep the orders straight when less than a third of the restaurant is full. My turn! Pork Belly Carnitas, as soft as expected, but totally forgettable.



The other side gets another generic, and then my long-awaited Octopus arrives. This one is good. Really good. Tender, ten-tastic chargrilled chunks with chile and lime which I would have enjoyed more had I not been choking on the ridiculous service.


Wow Petty Cash Taqueria, you are everything I despise in restaurant form. A perversion of street food, you take a culinary unifier, something affordable to and enjoyed by all, regardless of class or race or means, and turn it into an abomination. Some would argue that the significant inflation in price is for the service, but I've had better from every single food truck or street corner stall. Congratulations, Petty Cash Taqueria, for creating the most insulting homage I've ever seen.
Petty Cash Taqueria Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato

Friday, January 15, 2016

Tasty block Hawaiian Shave Ice - Torrance


The best thing about being an adult is being able to have you cake and eat it without finishing your vegetables first. You can have ice cream for dinner if that's what you're feeling and your parents can do diddley squat about it.

But I'm not so irresponsible that I would just have ice cream for dessert. Shaved ice is a MUCH healthier option.



The Green Bean isn't too sweet so clearly there's not as much sugar as ice cream. Plus the green tea snow is matcha madness. Clearly it's full of antioxidants.




Condensed milk is the key to making shaved snow spectacularly healthy. Asian women have the highest risk of osteoporosis, and the Chocolate Strawberry Delight is milk-on-milk, so you get your dairy and a serving of fruit in chocolate syrup-covered strawberries.




The Mango Heaven is clearly a chip off the Hawaiian block. The mango-with-fresh-mango takes me back to the palm trees and sprawling sands with a healthy helping of tropical fruit.


I've had okay shaved snow, I've had good shaved snow, but I'd never had Tasty block shaved snow and it is GOOD!
Tastyblock Hawaiian Shave Ice Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato