Camelia - Los Angeles

Oh I just don't get it. LA has never been known for fine dining, but would it kill them to actually try? I get that the LA scene is too cool to care, but why do the fussy food if you don't want to fuss? 

Coming off a rave review from the LA Times, Camelia tops my list of pricey places to peruse. 

I made a reservation for 5:30 on a Sunday night, an early bird hour for two friends with kids, and it was immediately clear that the experience wasn't going to be part of the package. The decor was as expected for LA; naked tables, simple settings. The problem was that we were seated at one end of a series of 3 two-tops that were literally only two inches apart. Not bad for the people on the two ends, but a couple was later led to our almost-adjoining table and mercifully declined to sit - I suspect they did not wish to have 4 others join them on their date. The restaurant isn't roomy, but it's not so tight I can't take off my jacket without punching someone in the face. Would even 4-6 inches between tables be too much to ask? 

We opt for the tasting menu, a nightly tour of Camelia's greatest hits in smaller portions. 

Bluefin Tuna Toast is beautiful. Meaty, marbled marvels slide like silk, enveloped by fragrant shiso offset with a whiff of wasabi.

Chicken Liver Mousse Toast is a classic, a creamy billow of bile, fat against a sweet persimmon mostarda, lightened by a slice of daikon. East meets west for fusion at its finest. 

The salad boasts these beautiful leaves of pink radicchio, the bitterness of which a bit of vinegar mollifies. They are an enchanting contrast to a bed of creamy burrata and soft kabocha agebitashi, flavors that boldly contrast yet seamlessly float together. 

Hokkaido Uni Pasta. My three favorite words in the whole world. This statement is true...but only in the most literal sense. The only uni is on top, a creamy half-nibble, with a careless twirl of spaghetti so undercooked it couldn't cling to any of the "uni butter", which is so subtle it isn't there. 

I think they were going for understated but they forgot the “der”. The uni remained unstated except for the little bit at the top, though the pasta was notably unDERcooked. 

This Grilled Loup de Mer is a most perfect specimen. Crispy skin, tender white flesh, a ginger ponzu just assertive enough to brighten a naturally neutral fish, and bok choy because...bok choy is Asian. The stems are not the most appealing. No flavor there so eat with big bites of sauce.

If I could choose only one thing from my few and far between fine dining experiences it would be a perfect Steak. And this is the night they decide to serve a real New York strip. The steak is exquisite but the plating, just what the actual... 

A runaway onion ring settles in a spiral like a dropped bottle cap as the runner lowers my steak at an awkward angle of at least 50 degrees. My onion rings give some side eye as the swish of sauce smiles back. The steak is so perfectly done, but I feel like I'm eating someone's nose. 

Also, the tempura onion rings taste like butter. That's how you know it's French - even the tempura tastes like butter. 

Here is my friend's plate, in case you are wondering how the steak is supposed to look.

I expect dessert to be a throwaway, but this Tart will be among the best I'll have this year. The citrus asserts in a tangy yuzu custard, and it snaps against the sugar while contrasting the bold and bitter strip of matcha, which is just thick enough to make this tart exceptional. 

Service is just enough so you don't yearn for privacy but feel like you can have all the help you need. It's impersonal but professional, though it's pretty clear no one cares about their plating tonight. I don't know about this place. Maybe I should have tried the more unusual dishes on their menu or maybe I should have gone back to Bestia. Either way, I'll be staying in the South Bay when I want some real uni pasta. I'll at least get a proper plate at Spoon House. 

Bavel - Los Angeles

The other half of the Bestia group, I present Bavel, What Bestia is for pasta, here's the group's answer to middle eastern. We approach Bavel at an interesting time, the night after LA's most expensive meal at Vespertine. 

We go directly from a restaurant Michelin adored to the one he wouldn't give the time of day, and I’m starting to think he's an idiot. For literally less than 20% the cost, Bavel was equal in some ways and close enough in every other. My review is a little biased after being gutted by the prices, but I do think my delight is deserved. 

The menu is varied, but sometimes it appears understated, specially with the starters. They don't appears to be quite as much as they are. The Duck 'Nduja Hummus, for example, is simply a smooth bed of chickpeas savored up by spiced grains of finely ground duck. It's served with these fluffy pitas, the freshest I've ever had. You can literally see the dough deflate as they arrive, hot and airy on the plate.  

The Baba Ghanoush is smoky and creamy, topped with a deep-oven mix of chunky mushroom and eggplant. There's a golden-brown sesame-studded fried pita on the side, and you'll have to pay for extra because one isn't enough and you may not even want to stop at ten. 

Cool down with a dish of juicy Marinated Olives. The marinade is light so they're almost fruity, and you can't go wrong with some feta. 

The Cucumber & Asian Pear is a bit of a palate cleanser, and I thought it'd be more like a salad filler, but the blanket of whipped feta is like a thick, cheesy yogurt, and a drizzle of harissa and dash of black garlic elevates the flavors and keeps the dish sharp.

The Roasted Kanpachi Collar is a surprise, though not of an unpleasant nature. It seems more Asian-inspired than anything I would expect from the Mediterranea or middle east. The fish is fresh and cooked to a tender perfection, and the green curry beneath is thick and just the right amount of coconut and sweet. They do suggest you slather the fish with it, and to make that possible, I wish they'd include a little more. 

Lamb Flatbread. They really are the masters of bread. That soft, chewy base/dipper is the real show-stealer here, though the spicy sausage is nothing to sneeze at. This flatbread is a feisty one, and each bite will nip you back. 

Comfort food comes with melt-in-your-mouth chunks of Braised Wagyu Beef Cheek Tagine. There's dried fruit to sweeten the pot, and the sauce is a gravy over a light side of cous cous with cashews.

Aged Half Duck is a meaty main, a skewering sword of breast with crispy skin and a fatty leg of confit. I’m not sure how you're suppose to family style the side of sipping broth, but this dish is all about the meat anyway. 

If I could do dinner over, I’d just get giant platters of pita with a couple bowls of hummus and baba ganoush. Not because everything else wasn’t awesome but because just these simple items were so amazing they could have stood alone. You can build a bakery on that pita bread alone. 

Nightshade - Los Angeles

A week of N’s, first N/naka then to Nightshade. Two female chefs, culinary greats and LA legends. Chef Mei Lin stands at the counter at her first flagship, adding finishing touches to all her plates, giving a final nod of approval before a servers whisk them to their rightful place.

Mei Lin has the best eyebrows I've ever seen. They're full but all the same length and they have a symmetrical arch that doesn't fall too angular, demarcated by the sharpest lines. Her cooking is probably just as precise.

Cocktails are a waste of money...Not here. Their mixologist is skilled and dare I say...interesting. I could have ten more of these No. 914 Mezcal I traded my No. 12 Gin for. The gin drink has fruity notes with rhubarb and sour plum, a tart that is gentle, not sharp, with a settling sake and neutralizing tonic to smooth out the edges. I'm impressed by the gin, but I prefer the sharper surprises from the green dream. The shishito infusion makes it peppery and sharp, and acid from the lime cuts the spice. Potent little circles of black garlic oil climb up your nose just enough to make you think. 

Garlic then onion. Not the best for dates, but I'd never date anyone who doesn't eat garlic or onion. The Tom Yum Onion, fare for an Asian state fair, bathes in a seasoning that is strangely reminiscent for cool ranch Doritos. You're getting it for the coconut dip - it's creamy but ends things on a light and wholesome note.

This one is a smaller, lighter dish, the Baja Kanpachi in dashi with yuzu. Spoon up the citrus-water and drink with a springy slice of bright-and-buttery.

A side of Roasted Sunchokes suffices as a main. The artichoke-potato lovechild is creamy-soft, but the flavor takes on a nuttier note with an acid-alkaline mole. The deep-roasted strawberry notes are robust, perked up by a seedy granola crunch. 

An iteration of Prawn Toast, a juicy shrimp conglomerate on a crispy toast that keeps its integrity despite stewing in an aromatic Cantonese curry.

Nashville hot chicken is nothing compared to this Szechuan Hot Quail. It burns and it hurts so good, a gamier and dark-meatier little bird that doesn't play chicken. Its savor clashes with red-hot breading to brew a perfect storm. A cushion of fluffy Japanese milk bread is full of drippings, and a side of house pickles are a break from the spice and the grease - the daikon will change your mind about pickles even if you hate them. 

The Silkened Tofu mollifies the mouth like a burn-balm for the quail. It approximates the texture of a soy panna cotta, and chia seeds and green apple-sorrel add a fruity, forest-y, textured finish. It's an unexpected ending,one that doesn't sugar-load or over-sweeten but leaves you feeling less heavy and gross as you reluctantly get up to leave. 

We knew Mei Lin was brilliant, but we didn't know what she'd do without Mike. Now that her career as a sous chef is no longer written in Ink, I love seeing her shine as her own chef, a top chef for sure. At least 4 stars for the food, 4.5 for the execution and creativity, 5 stars for the eyebrows.

Salt & Straw - Los Angeles

I love Salt & Straw. I love it even more without the line out the door, and Thursday 2 PM is the time to GO! 

It's already hard to walk by the small-batch chocolate they're featuring, and it's even harder to try just three samples. Girlfriend decides Orange County Honey Rocky Road is the one. It's a nutty chocolate with a honey finish, a sweeter spin on sweet, sweet classic.

My third sample is for funsies - I've been dying to try this infamous Bone Marrow and Cherry ice cream...Oh what fresh hell is this?! I hate it and I am so impressed! A unique flavor profile for sure, greasy and meaty on the finish despite being made of milk. All sorts of smoky and strange with a touch of fruit at the end. Oh man, this is like a man-bun. It's not for me, nor should it be for most people, but unlike the man-bun it's a perspective worth sharing that I'm glad I got to see. 

All ice cream tastes better inside a giant waffle cone, IMO. This Roasted Strawberry and White Chocolate is dense and creamy with the occasional gooey-berry clump.

I love ice cream, but I don't think all flavors are suitable for ice cream, and there are many creative ones that I definitely don't want in a cone. I love Salt & Straw for this; they're not afraid to challenge my perception of what ice cream should be, and whatever they make, they make incredibly well, whether or not it caters to my whimsy. There's not a single thing they do that I don't madly respect, and I'll be back even if the salted caramel is the only thing I'll eat.