Les Francais at Fada French Bistro – Brooklyn

Fada, ma cherie, je parle what little francais I can actually remember because you are oh-so-undeniably French! I cannot help but insert my Francais because you are so francais so it will greatly helpez-vous if you read this revue like you are singing through your nose.

My friend and I started le dinner abruptly, with none of the oh-so-familiarly-francais onion soup or pate. Nowadays every restaurant wants to be just a little francais and even the non-non coffee shops will microwave a coupe of soupe. The French are always seeking le mot juste, or the right word at the right time, and in our case, le mot du jour was Steak Tartare. The French have mastered tartare as well as the baguette, and if I needed any more proof then the beautifully bilingual staff, this dish was it. The beef was flawlessly smooth with bursts of flavor topped with a delicate quail egg, and forget fruit and yogurt, THIS is what I call parfait.

The tartare needed to be offset by some crispy kale, so the Kale Salad was the logical next step. But ohlala, the exquisite disappointment! With obnoxious amounts of dressing and parmesan this salade was more closely related to le spinach dip and tasted as congested as a true Frenchman sounds.

The dense, steamy-hot, baked comfort-in-a-pan Lasagna was le dish juste after a raw tartare , and the veal added a surprising savor. The lasagna is probably the only non-French thing in this entire bistro, but that beef and veal ragu got plenty of amour from me.

There was an entire stick of le butter under the Skate, but somehow it never soaked into the breading, leaving it crunchy without even the slightest hint of sogginess. The skate itself was a fresh and tender center surrounded by perfect crispy-crunchy breading with an artery-clogging finish.

My feelings about Fada are conflicted at best. The food is fine with some real gems like the tartare, but I can’t even count on two hands the number of times I’ve had better. I think this review sounds more like Pepe le Pew than une foodie but it feels so much like Parisian bistros from my distant past that I can’t help myself (HonhHonhHonh). Along those lines, Fada is easily my foreign fling. On a student budget, I’m sure to save if I stay-cation at Fada instead of flying away to France, but I think I’d also rather fly away to another French bistro if I’m craving better food.