The Kettle UPDATE - Manhattan Beach

 

I liked it better last time, but I didn't hate it this time. 

It's my fault for not making better choices, but the Bananas Foster French Toast is all on them. Walnuts and banana sauteed in brown sugar sounds like a winner, but the walnuts are pretty raw, and, and the bread is extremely limp.

BBQ Pulled Pork Hash sounds like decadent fun, and the execution is pretty impressive inside a take-out container. Love the tater tots, and dumping some pork on top is a good idea. Break the eggs and give it a stir!

Sarah's Favorite...not my favorite. Not bad, though the fruit isn't very ripe.

The orange zest Muffin is nice, but I liked the blueberry better. That said, they still make a mean muffin here. 

No harm no foul. With a menu as myriad as The Kettle, what you order is so important, and it can be a hit or miss. At least at The Kettle, it's usually an even mix. 

The Kettle UPDATE - Manhattan Beach

Imagine it. The worst hangover of your life. The head-pounding, eye-bulging, can-hear-an-ant-breathe-in-the-next-room, even-your-hair-hurts kind of drank-like-you're-still-21 walk of shame. 

Now imagine the best case scenario. Your whole day is gone no matter what you do, and there's no way the nausea will abate before bedtime. But there is something that might get you through the next hour if your sunglasses are dark enough. 

Have a seat on the patio at The Kettle. Wear your mask until your food arrives, and believe me, you'll want to because hangovers make everything smell just that much more. Stay away from the people you didn't come with because they are just too loud. Order Banana Pancakes. These pancakes are fluffy but thin enough to make a manageable stack. There’s something about passing the side of your fork through all five layers and seeing them rebound as your molars cut through the stripes. They're soft enough that you don't need a knife on those mornings when you just can't do the extra work, and they do taste like real but slightly sweetened banana. It's the right mix of sugar and carbs to settle your stomach and fuel the rest of a painful day. 

Need protein? Try one of their 6-egg omelets. I don't really know how many eggs they use, but this rock of a Crab Omelet isn't exactly stingy. It really does taste crabby in a fishy manner so I opt for veggies or pork if you have a hangover or are not accustomed to fishy flavors. Just don't skip the side of home fries. They’re well-seasoned and nowadays, that seems to be a miracle. Plus they got the potato just right; soft but not too mushy. Potatoes are a lost art, but The Kettle seems to have found them. They also throw in a muffin. Mine was blueberry. It was TO DIE FOR. Seriously, I could have just eaten 6 muffins.  

I normally hate brunch, and breakfast is a part of the day I usually skip. But The Kettle does cook a good one if you're in the mood, and you'll leave satisfied and way too full even if you're not. I was lukewarm in my previous review, but I think I got a new appreciation for their pancakes and potatoes. 

The Kettle - Manhattan Beach

Remember when Beanie Babies were the coolest thing since sliced bread? Parents were lining up for miles outside the local Hallmark store for a chance to snag coveted fuzzy friend, and their market value went as high as $250 for Tabasco the bull when he was retired. Looking back, all this hype was clearly a load of bull, but the rise and fall of the Beanie Baby just goes to show the true nature of trends: When things become too popular, they suddenly cease to be cool.

A similar thing happened to seafood. Shellfish used to be exclusive and hard to come by, especially the ones that required a lot of work like blue crab. But then crab became packaged, and suddenly, the crab cake was as common as Pokemon cards, even at dive-y diners like The Kettle. Their Crab Cake Po' Boy fails to hit the spot with a bland, crouton-y crab cake full of fillers and covered with sriracha mayo minus the sriracha.

The same crab cakes make an encore appearance on the Crabcake Benedict, with its standard poached eggs on an English muffin under a decent-but-generic Hollandaise. If the crab cakes don't step it up, they'll go the way of the Tomagotchi. Find me one person under the age of 20 who knows that that is. 

Unlike the crab cakes, the Cannoli Pancakes had potential. They sound as gimicky as Furby, a child-pleasing, small-beaked alien spewing all sorts of nonsense, but they actually taste pretty good. The whipped ricotta is light and sweet, and the chocolate chips make it complete. Not the most original of ideas, but there's a reason you still see Furby in stores.

I've always been a late-adopter when it comes to trends, but so far that has only prevented me from indulging in what hindsight hails as frivolous foolishness. The Kettle is a late-adopter too. Their previously-trendy, diner-style shabby-chic has been done and done to death, and considering they still prosper in the subtly stylish streets of Manhattan Beach, I don't know who they think they're fooling. The forced casualness of the food make it easily forgettable, and the fact that it's one of the few open-late restaurants in Manhattan Beach is probably the only reason I'd go again.